What I am really thankful for

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Here it is, two days after Thanksgiving and I find myself needing to reflect upon the things that I am truly grateful for. 
We have a tradition in my family.  Just before we take our first bite of Thanksgiving dinner, we take turns going around the table, saying something that we are thankful for.  Each year,  I rush to take my turn because in the moment I am not really thinking much about what I am really thankful for;  shamefully,  I am more  worried more about the fact that I have spent the last 8 hours cooking, and by the time we make our rounds saying our “thanks”, the dinner I have worked so hard to make will be cold.

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Today, I find myself reflecting, feeling selfish.  I find myself wanting to go back to our Thanksgiving dinner and focus, not on the turkey, mashed potatoes, and homemade pies, but on the things that are most important.  It is so easy to get caught up in the chaos of day-to-day life.  It is easy to trudge through life and lose sight of what matters.  I often feel like I wish the days away –  I fast forward the days longing for the weekends when I get a much-needed respite from my week day life of being a single parent which involves endless hours of  carpooling, packing lunches, cleaning   house, cooking dinner and helping with homework.

1002011As I take a much-needed step back, I see how easy it is to start feeling sorry for myself.  I get caught up in thinking about things I wish I had, things I wish I had done differently,  things I wish I could do, things I wish I could do better and things I wish I hadn’t done at all.  If only I had, more time to exercise, more time to relax, more help from my husband –more money for vacations and more time for me.  I realize today more than ever that I think more about the those things more than I should and less about the wonderful things in my life.  So today, I am taking time to think more about the things that really matter.

This is my Thanksgiving reflection – my journal entry about the things, the gifts, that have been given to me – the gifts for which I AM truly grateful:

100_1709I am thankful for five beautiful children – a daughter who likes me again and has grown up to be a lovely young woman and for four young boys who somehow think the sun rises and sets on me.  I am thankful for being chosen as a person that God felt could handle the challenges of caring for a child with a life threatening health condition.  Over the years, I have been asked if I were angry that I was given a child with disabilities.  Now, I think about the families less fortunate- families that have lost children or that have children with disabilities far greater than my son’s, and my answer is no,  I am thankful.

I am thankful that my husband provides us with the resources to give us a comfortable life.

I am thankful for having so many wonderful friends, who, over the years, have each played a special roll in my life – to make me laugh, to keep me grounded, to  provide  support, to  listen to the same story over and over again and to  tell me the truth even when it might have been easier for them to lie.

I am thankful for my parents; without their tremendous help and support; I could not have made it through the last thirteen years.

I am thankful for all of my siblings who have been among my best supporters and who have been the best friends anyone could ever have.

I am thankful for the strength that it has taken me to help get Sam to a better place.

I am thankful for my health and for the health of everyone I love.

As I write, I  hear  my children laughing loudly and playing in the back ground, a sound that admittedly at times can annoy me.  Today, it’s not so annoying.

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1004308Today,   I am thinking a lot more about all the “little things”  and how precious they are– the things, I am guilty for taking for granted.  Things, that in retrospect really aren’t so “little.”

Today I am thankful for everything and everyone – especially not knowing what tomorrow may bring.

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Today, more than ever, I am aware of how very thankful that I am to have such an amazing life.

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Happy Holidays to all of my readers and thank you for giving me this time to reflect on everything that I AM truly thankful for!

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